I WILL ALWAYS BE THERE FOR YOU

Out of the clear blue sky, one of your best buddies keels over from a sudden heart attack and dies eventually after spending a week in a coma. Another tragically loses a child. A couple you thought you knew oh so well decide to get a divorce after many years of what seemed to be an extremely happy marriage. What does a true friend do or say to try and offer comfort?

One of the things I vividly remember about losing my dad occured as I stood next to his casket, looking back at a small group of mourners filing into the funeral home viewing area. Most of the people moving slowly down the line towards my family to offer their sympathies were relatives that I hadn't seen for quite some time. In the very back of the room stood a small group of people who I was really surprised to find. Ten or twelve of my co-workers stood quietly.

It was probably a forty minute drive for most of them to the small town I grew up in and none of my work pals had ever met my dad to my knowlege. To this day, what impressed me the most was the simple fact that they were there for me in this time of need.

It also felt wonderfully good to tell them stories about my dad and my home-town: How we used to go fishing in Canada when I was a young boy; what a great athlete and dancer he had been; what it was like to grow up in a city by a river; what it was that I felt dad had died from. As I look back now, I am so thankful they gave me a reason to talk about my family and my life. It isn't good to hold things in.

The main thing I felt truly grateful for was the simple fact that people came. It's so easy to moan, "I can't go...what would I talk about?", or "What would I say?". You don't have to say anything, just be there and listen.

To all those of you who are going through rough times now, I say to you...I will always be there for you. If I can't be there in person, I will be there in spirit-either in my nightly prayers or while jogging down a country road. And if you ever feel a need to talk...my ears, or this computer will always, always be open.